I shared a room as a child, I was 8 my sister was a newborn. I still remember her waking up in the middle of the night and me getting up to turn the music box back on. Brahm's Lullaby is forever ingrained in my head. I have hope that because they're close enough in age it might make them closer, that it might work for them but until we figure it all out I have at least searched many an inspiration photo:
Friday, June 24, 2011
Shared spaces
If our home purchase goes through the boys will have to share a room, at least for a little while. The house is large, but is essentially a 2 family home. Or better put a family home with an attached in-law suite. The main house has 2 bedrooms, the in-law suite has one, in the basement. Eventually, we will probably convert the house back to a single family home essentially doing away with the in-law suite but for the first little while it will stay as is. Which means our boys (3 &5) will have to share a room. I have some misgivings about the idea, if only because my oldest is not a very good sleeper and my youngest is.
I shared a room as a child, I was 8 my sister was a newborn. I still remember her waking up in the middle of the night and me getting up to turn the music box back on. Brahm's Lullaby is forever ingrained in my head. I have hope that because they're close enough in age it might make them closer, that it might work for them but until we figure it all out I have at least searched many an inspiration photo:
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I shared a room as a child, I was 8 my sister was a newborn. I still remember her waking up in the middle of the night and me getting up to turn the music box back on. Brahm's Lullaby is forever ingrained in my head. I have hope that because they're close enough in age it might make them closer, that it might work for them but until we figure it all out I have at least searched many an inspiration photo:
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
my brain is fuzzy...
As much fun as I am having redesigning the "fate house" in my head, I still find myself coming back to decorating this house. Maybe because it doesn't even feel real yet, because our offer hasn't been accepted and the conditions definitely haven't been met. Our house isn't even on the market yet. We still have some major work to do on it before we can officially put it on the market. OK, by major work I mean some painting, trim, painting, landscaping, painting, and um painting. The bones of the place are finished. The major work has been completed, now it's a matter of making it look pretty.
Which is why I am still thinking in terms of decorating this house. After all staging a house for sale is big business so it's got to look just right. Plus, as hopeful as we are that it will all work out we have to accept the possibility that it won't... and that means we'll still be here in the fall so any choices I make to prep the house for sale are still somewhat personal decisions, because it could be the decisions that we are living with for a couple more years until we happen upon another house that strikes our fancy!
The Selling List:
Which is why I am still thinking in terms of decorating this house. After all staging a house for sale is big business so it's got to look just right. Plus, as hopeful as we are that it will all work out we have to accept the possibility that it won't... and that means we'll still be here in the fall so any choices I make to prep the house for sale are still somewhat personal decisions, because it could be the decisions that we are living with for a couple more years until we happen upon another house that strikes our fancy!
The Selling List:
- Paint front door
- Curb appeal-walk, flower beds
- Landscaping the back yard
- Fix back deck
- Paint- neutral colors
- Re-stain stairs to match flooring
- Dylan's flooring
- Trim- painted and re-installed
- Trim fireplace in basement
- Stage house
- CLEAN, CLEAN, CLEAN
we did it...
We made an offer on the "fate house". Conditional on selling our house. Admittedly it scares the crap out of me... trying to get this house done and sold seems like a daunting task to say the least... by the first of September, no less, so we can be in the new house in time for Dylan to start school in the right school district.
Will it all work out? I have no idea, anyone want to buy a house?
Will it all work out? I have no idea, anyone want to buy a house?
Friday, June 17, 2011
Eeyore
This week I feel like this...
I know I am not perfect, but I still find myself striving to be. To be a perfect Mom, to look perfectly pulled together, to have a perfectly cleaned and organized and decorated house, a perfect yard, perfect children. I know it's not feasible, it's not attainable. But I compare myself to perfect, I feel guilty that I CANNOT do it all. Guilty that I'm overwhelmed by the responsibility of two children, a dog, a house, a yard. I clean, and clean, and organize, and clean all day... and yet when Bruce comes home it looks the very same as when he left in the morning, or worse. It's a disaster zone. A chaotic, messy, disorganized disaster zone. Chaos. Bedlam. Pandemonium. Mayhem.Far, far from perfect! Yesterday my 3 year old found a paint roller (with wet paint still on it because I am disorganized and forgetful) and painted the guest room... the floor, the furniture, the sheets...It makes me think why doesn't my house look like this:
I cleaned out my closet this morning, it only took about 10 minutes to throw away all the stuff that I don't wear, and organize the 3 or 4 things I do wear. Perfectly put together I am not. Not when you wear the one same outfit every. single. time. you. go. out. because you have nothing else that is even in the realm of nice. My Mom says I'm frumpy because I at home I tend to wear scrub pants and t-shirts. I guess she would be right. It's not that I don't care how I look, it's that the kids need clothes and food and toys, there's no money left for Mama to shop. And besides, nothing looks great on my jiggly, post baby, never bothered to try to get fit again body. I think why can't I look like this:
I yell. And threaten to throw out all the kids toys. I miss the days when I was more than just a servant and a cleaning lady. When I remembered how to play with them, and teach them. I spend so much time doing loads and loads of laundry, cleaning up everyone elses messes, changing bums (because I am not organized enough or self-disciplined enough for potty training) picking up the mess, trying to make sure that everything looks perfect when Bruce comes home, picking up the mess, playing where's my... that I just don't seem to have quality time for either of my boys anymore. At the end of the day I am burnt. I don't take "me time". I just go to bed. Wake up the next day and do it all over again.
My biggest challenge isn't to be perfect but to stop striving to be. To stop comparing myself to everyone else and just be me. Comparison must be ingrained in the female DNA though, comparison and perfectionism!
I know I am not perfect, but I still find myself striving to be. To be a perfect Mom, to look perfectly pulled together, to have a perfectly cleaned and organized and decorated house, a perfect yard, perfect children. I know it's not feasible, it's not attainable. But I compare myself to perfect, I feel guilty that I CANNOT do it all. Guilty that I'm overwhelmed by the responsibility of two children, a dog, a house, a yard. I clean, and clean, and organize, and clean all day... and yet when Bruce comes home it looks the very same as when he left in the morning, or worse. It's a disaster zone. A chaotic, messy, disorganized disaster zone. Chaos. Bedlam. Pandemonium. Mayhem.Far, far from perfect! Yesterday my 3 year old found a paint roller (with wet paint still on it because I am disorganized and forgetful) and painted the guest room... the floor, the furniture, the sheets...It makes me think why doesn't my house look like this:
Image: The Pioneer Woman
(Who has 4 kids, and at least 2 dogs, and cows and horses)
I cleaned out my closet this morning, it only took about 10 minutes to throw away all the stuff that I don't wear, and organize the 3 or 4 things I do wear. Perfectly put together I am not. Not when you wear the one same outfit every. single. time. you. go. out. because you have nothing else that is even in the realm of nice. My Mom says I'm frumpy because I at home I tend to wear scrub pants and t-shirts. I guess she would be right. It's not that I don't care how I look, it's that the kids need clothes and food and toys, there's no money left for Mama to shop. And besides, nothing looks great on my jiggly, post baby, never bothered to try to get fit again body. I think why can't I look like this:
I yell. And threaten to throw out all the kids toys. I miss the days when I was more than just a servant and a cleaning lady. When I remembered how to play with them, and teach them. I spend so much time doing loads and loads of laundry, cleaning up everyone elses messes, changing bums (because I am not organized enough or self-disciplined enough for potty training) picking up the mess, trying to make sure that everything looks perfect when Bruce comes home, picking up the mess, playing where's my... that I just don't seem to have quality time for either of my boys anymore. At the end of the day I am burnt. I don't take "me time". I just go to bed. Wake up the next day and do it all over again.
My biggest challenge isn't to be perfect but to stop striving to be. To stop comparing myself to everyone else and just be me. Comparison must be ingrained in the female DNA though, comparison and perfectionism!
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Fate?
fate
[feyt] noun, verb, fat·ed, fat·ing.1.
something that unavoidably befalls a person; fortune; lot: It is always his fate to be left behind.
2.
3.
that which is inevitably predetermined; destiny:
We've been toying with the idea of selling our house for awhile now, we peruse real estate ads looking for a house that meets all of our criteria for moving. We have an interesting wish list and there aren't many houses out there that meet the list. First of all we want more land, at least 3 acres but more is better. We want land but we don't want to live in the country, we want to be within a 5 minute commute to the convenience store. We want a house that doesn't need to be renovated. Tweaked to suit our lifestyle, minor renos, but no top to bottom overhaul. We have spent the past 6 years gutting almost every room in our current house, we want the freedom to enjoy life now, have fun with the kids. In this part of the world that's a bit of a tall order. We've been window shopping.
We've driven by many a home without going in and ruled them out as contenders. We've looked at a couple; one that had 20 acres but the acreage was a hill all unusable for running and playing. Another that had 12 acres, a glorious pool and a massive (4500 square foot) historic house... which needed way too much work. And then there was the "one that got away"... back around Easter we found a cedar house 5 minutes from Bruce's work, with 5.5 acres in town. We gawked at the pictures, discussed it all weekend and decided we should go see it because it really was the whole package for us. Bruce called and it had already sold :(
We've consciously or unconsciously compared every house we've looked at since to that one. We've complained about missing out on it. The other day when looking again at the real estate sites it was back. Immediately I inquired if it was in fact back on the market and it was! We went Saturday for a viewing and it really was everything we have been looking for from a property. Country living right in the heart of things. PERFECT.
So, what's the problem? Um... we have this house that we live in, that we've spent a lot of money fixing up, that isn't finished, that we would have to sell before we could buy a new house. There's no question in my mind that is the only way to go. We can make an offer, but it has to be conditional on selling this house. In a perfect world it our house would be finished already, and sell FAST. Sadly this isn't a perfect world...
Bruce figures 'nothing ventured nothing gained'. He says it's fate that this house came back on the market on the very same day we looked at another house. A house we could have lived in but didn't feel like it was the one. This house feels like the one. There was the emotional response, the envisioning of us actually living there. It's the right one. Fate has handed it to us, now lets see what we can do about it! Oh... and the redecorating ideas have already started rolling around in that crazy head of mine!
Anyone want to buy a house?
So, what's the problem? Um... we have this house that we live in, that we've spent a lot of money fixing up, that isn't finished, that we would have to sell before we could buy a new house. There's no question in my mind that is the only way to go. We can make an offer, but it has to be conditional on selling this house. In a perfect world it our house would be finished already, and sell FAST. Sadly this isn't a perfect world...
Bruce figures 'nothing ventured nothing gained'. He says it's fate that this house came back on the market on the very same day we looked at another house. A house we could have lived in but didn't feel like it was the one. This house feels like the one. There was the emotional response, the envisioning of us actually living there. It's the right one. Fate has handed it to us, now lets see what we can do about it! Oh... and the redecorating ideas have already started rolling around in that crazy head of mine!
Anyone want to buy a house?
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
B&B Love
I am not that original... my decor choices and inspirations are influenced by magazines and of course other blogs. I can honestly say that I have never seen so much board and batten in any other resource as design blogs... and the truth is I LOVE it. Every time I see a space transformed with paneled walls I want it in my own house. My cookie cutter house...
I have reservations about putting it in, not because I wouldn't love it but what about when we go to sell the house? Will others like it? This is my inspiration picture... not that there aren't MANY beautiful inspirations but because I have green walls and brown leather couches and don't think either of those will be changing anytime soon!
I have reservations about putting it in, not because I wouldn't love it but what about when we go to sell the house? Will others like it? This is my inspiration picture... not that there aren't MANY beautiful inspirations but because I have green walls and brown leather couches and don't think either of those will be changing anytime soon!
Can I do it?
Not a whole lot of living goes on in my living room, in part because the tv is in the basement family room, and in part because I liken the room to a waiting room. We are not "formal" people, but we have a formal living room of sorts... really it is much more like a waiting room. There's little personality.
Can I do it?
Can I convince Bruce?
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Cookie Cutter
We plan to move someday, but today someday seems so far away! I have struggled with the idea that I can't really make this house what I want it to be for whole list of reasons:
- This isn't the forever house
- What if what I want isn't really good for resale, what if it is too personal?
- This house is a prime example of a cookie cutter house, a classic long faced split entry, you know the ones... and once you've seen one you've seen 'em all! So no character. Boxy, boring rooms. There's hardly a room we haven't touched in some way since it was built in the 70's and when we bought it it clearly showed its age and lack of tlc, but we've focused on rebuilding more than redecorating. New windows, siding, roof, interior painting and flooring. The house still lacks character in my opinion, but would adding character actually detract from the value of the house because it would look odd?
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